Mistake
by Hyuchiha Ruki
Summary: Sometimes, we do stupid things that we wished we hadn't done. Call it an accident. Call it a mistake. It's all the same. There'll still be damage done and someone'll have to suffer the consequences. TemShikaIno requested song fic. R&R.


**This is another request by Swords and Bandages, which is fine because I think I should really stop thinking of 'D3' and the Jellybean Collection even for just a while. The song is 'Damage' by Chris Brown and once again, I loved it.**

**Over here it's early in the morning as I write this so I'm a little drowsy. Bear with me.**

**_To Swords and Bandages: _I hope you'll like this. I'm willing to accept and do requested fics almost anytime and I always find time to do them, so it's fine. I'm just hoping this is good enough. I'm sorry I couldn't do one with Neji or Naruto in it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the song I'm using.**

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We've been talking on the phone for an hour and a half already. But during that time, not once did I hear a sweet or forgiving tone out of her. All I hear at the other end are sobs, yells and as it got longer, she has started doing both at the same time.

She, after all, has every right to hate me after that night.

But, seriously, it was… an accident. I didn't even see it coming. Can't you understand, you damned troublesome woman?

_Damage…  
__You know…  
__Sometimes you don't realize what you've done, until you've seen the damage...  
__And I looked at the damage..._

"You know what, Shikamaru? I thought you were a genius! I thought you were the brains of Team Ten. Well, if you're so wise, then how come you weren't smart enough to stop this from happening?" She keeps on telling me the same thing, hiccupping and probably wiping her eyes.

Now, this isn't right. Usually, I was the one talking some sense into her head. But this time, she's telling me how much of a fool I am. And, guess what? She's right. She's absolutely right.

_Whoa… yea… yea… Whoa… yea…  
__Look at the damage…_

But look at me. I'm just seated here on my bed, in my room with my phone on my ear. No tears, no angry screams, nothing. I didn't do them because they were girly emotional stuff. I didn't do them because… these things won't get Ino back and undo everything I've done, right?

Still, I've got to convince her that I didn't do it because I didn't love her. It just… happened! It's like I was asleep, sleep-walking. I, myself, can't figure out why I was so clumsy… so stupid.

"Look, Ino," I replied, my voice going coarse but still collected, "I didn't want it to happen. Maybe if you just listen to me and… and hear what I have to say, you'd understand. You'd know about the whole truth." But, hell, I know she'd never understand.

She didn't reply immediately. I can hear her still sniffing, her sobs growing louder by the second. How could I have been such an awful boyfriend? She didn't deserve this. I know she also cheated back then on her past boyfriends… but I'm the only guy she didn't cheat on and from what I see, she doesn't plan to.

Her voice came back, "I've been listening to you on phone for quite some time now. And all I hear is you saying that it wasn't your fault…"

"I-It wasn't!" I had to defend myself, but this kind of defense was lying. Two wrongs don't make a right, definitely.

She let out a frustrated and rather angered grunt at the other end and mumbled with her crying still affecting her voice, "How is it not your fault? You didn't have self-control. What is wrong with you, Shikamaru? Have I done something wrong to make this happen? Is it because you hate me?"

The feeling I feel towards her is the complete opposite of hate, but I'm assuming that it doesn't seem to be so right now.

I was silent till she said something. "Y-You know what? Forget it. I don't want to hear your excuses…" she finally spoke up, probably to conclude the phone call. My eyes darted forward, looking out the window as if I was spacing out. As she keeps shedding tears for me, I just remain calm and think things over. Wasn't it the smart thing to do?

There was silence on both ends for the first time. I didn't know if I should talk first and apologize for the nth time or if I should shut up and wait for her to say something. Then, she said, "It's over. It happened already. We can't erase it now. But it's a thing of the past…"

Is she… finally forgiving me?

"If I'm not your everything," she continued, "I'd rather be nothing. If first love never dies then I must be just your second… or your eleventh! I'm sorry, Shikamaru, but this isn't going to work out."

Oh, gawd, no…

"Let me go." She choked on her words, then a beep blurt against my ear. She had hung up. By that statement, did she mean she wants to break up? Or… did she already break up with me with those words? Troublesome mixed messages.

I took my phone away from my ear and sighed. After placing it back on its pedestal, I couldn't help but ask, "How _did _it happen? This has got to be the most troublesome argument we had of all."

_3 A.M. when my phone ring, beggin' me to come by, I was right around the corner..  
__I know I could've said no but I ain't stop, told me "come in, the doors unlocked for you".  
__My intuition, I should, have listened to it,  
__My girl, yo, she'd be pissed if she knew about this visit..._

I remember things well.

_She _called me up. Temari. Yeah, the girl from Suna and my ex-girlfriend.

I thought things were already patched up with her and me. I thought we were back to being friends and just that. She knew I had Ino and I bet she has someone else right now. No, I didn't have nostalgia. I'm positive that I don't love her anymore.

Anyway, it was so damn early then. I have no idea what motivated me to actually pick up the phone, talk to her… and agree to pass by her house. She's leaving for Suna again, she says, and she said I could at least say bye.

I recall declining, telling her to wait for after sunrise. Seriously, only Ino called me at this time. I don't know what charm or persuasion or mind-trick she did on me. Whatever she did, whatever 'magic' she managed to pull on me, it worked. I got up and walked to her apartment.

_She had a tank top on, I took her tank top off, but should've stopped, STOP!.. sigh  
__But she ain't let me, kissed me soft and gently… she tempt me.  
__Right then I stopped thinkin' consequences...  
__Guess I must have lost my mind for a minute. listen._

Next thing I know, I'm with her.

Between the kisses and the touching, I wasn't awake. I wasn't conscious, like I was just dreaming. The darkness, the sheets, everything… it seems so far off as it was all just an illusion. I know I tried to break away many times, but she had something that wrapped me around her finger.

The way she whispers at my ear and how her breath feels so delicate down my skin… It's like hypnosis. I let go of being astute for that time. I just did what I felt like doing. I didn't think of what could happen next. I only thought of what was happening now.

In the middle of it all, I felt like I opened my eyes for the first time. And there, I didn't see Ino. Not her cerulean eyes, not her golden strands, and I didn't hear her angelic voice. I looked back at ebony eyes, dandelion-tinted locks and I heard Temari, just moaning.

I cursed under my breath and drew away. Gawd, how could I have been such a moron? A gullible fool! Love made men fools, yes, but this _isn't _love. This is not love. As long as it wasn't Ino there with me, I didn't do it out of love.

_Girl you know that I love.  
__Girl I love you.  
__With her that was lust..  
__Shouldn't have happened  
__I know I messed up...  
__One phone call started this whole thing now...  
__look at the damage.. damage..  
__look at the damage.._

I walked home, rushing. If anyone found out, if _Ino _found out, I'd die. I didn't want to do it in the first place. I don't know what came over me. I can't believe I became such a klutz. I was nearing my home when I went to check on my phone…

…And I found unread messages and two missed calls from Ino. Was it morning already? As in wake-up-and-start-the-day kind of morning? From when I came there at 3 in the morning, I'm walking home at 6:30! I literally slept there with Temari. How could I?

Ino sent messages, asking me if I was awake and she even said that she'd be coming over to bring important to my house. I'm in trouble if I don't get there before her. She'd wonder where I was… and she'd definitely wonder why I was such a mess. I had my hair in tangles, too.

I arrived home and found her seated on the porch. When she saw me, she immediately asked where I was. I had to lie. I said a mission came up and I had to go immediately. Although she wore a skeptical look, she bought it.

But soon, she just… found out. Ino's really good at uncovering things and mysteries, so I wasn't surprised when she just called me up and asked, "Tell me the truth: Were you with Temari the other morning?" But I wanted to just lie again and say no.

She squeezed everything out of me. I don't consider telling her the truth a mistake. It was only right. I can't lie to Ino. It'd only make things worst.

_Damage.. damage that I caused you.  
__I know I broke your heart, 'cause I did you wrong.  
__Look at the damage, look at the damage that I caused..._

That was it. She hasn't spoken to me till that phone conversation we had earlier. She didn't show up for training and if ever she does, she'd stick to Choji and she'd even go home early. Whenever we meet in the street, she'd look away. My existence wasn't important to her since she thinks she was nothing to me.

Okay, I deserved that. But she has just got to hear what I have to say.

_The dumbest decision that I made that I ain't proud of,  
__A few hours that meant absolutely nothing cost me your love..  
__I gotta live with regret, deserve to get what you give,  
__Now you won't listen to nothing that I'm saying._

This has got to be the biggest mistake of my life. _One_ of the biggest mistakes of my life, that is.

But she has to know that I didn't mean to do any of that. She's the only girl in my life and I swear that's true. I admit that on that night when I was with Temari… I saw her, Ino. I was thinking of her but I wasn't thinking straight. It's complicated and hard to explain…

…But I'm not going to stop talking to her about it until she sees what I mean.

I'm going to try again. I'm going to talk to her again, but I'm not going to call her. She'd probably just hang up on me every time. So troublesome. So, no matter how much of a drag this is going to be, I'm going to her house and make her listen.

I got up from my bunk, grabbed my vest from the coat hook on my way out and briskly, I made my way to her house.

But I somehow understand why she can't seem to forgive me for that one dumb act. I can't forgive myself for doing it, too. I find it so hard to believe that it happened to me. Not to Ino, but to me. If it had happened to her, there'd be disappointment, but I don't know if I'd still have the heart to dump her after that. She needs me…

…And I need her more.

I know I don't need any gifts or bouquets for now. Those material things are useless in this kind of situation. I can only fix things now with my words and actions. And if I can't mend this spat with those, I don't know what will.

What am I supposed to do? Go on bended knees and cry, asking for her forgiveness?

No, forgiveness doesn't come around like that. I'll have to earn it in another way, but what?

_Rode past your house for hours, just to feel close to ya..  
__no cards, no gifts, no flowers, could get me back with chu'...  
__Your kiss, your touch, girl you know I'm missin'  
__But you got my heart inside a prison, listen._

Luckily, she's home. The only light in the house is in her room and I'm betting it's her. Although, the light I see is just her lamp. She hasn't turned the fluorescent on. Oh, gawd, I broke her heart that much? The only times when she's too lazy to turn the light switch on is when she's so depressed.

But never mind the thing about the light. The very main thing that signified her heartbroken state are the tears. She's a strong woman and she has gone through many heartbreaks in the past… but not once did she cry over them. She's only crying over a boy, over me, now.

I hurt her so much. Can I die now?

"Ino!" I called out, knocking on the front door. As expected, there's no answer. I rolled my eyes and looked up at her window. I saw no silhouette, no shadow or figure to assure me that it's her in her room.

Not giving up, I tried again. Along with the knocks, I also rang the doorbell. Either she'd get irritated and just answer the door or she's mad enough to actually ignore me, even if I keep this up till the next morning.

I _will _if I have to.

Then, I heard footsteps from inside, making noises against the wooden stairs. She's coming down. I breathed a sigh of relief but when her steps grew louder, I thought of what I had to say and gulped, ready to speak when her voice pierced through from behind the shut door.

"Go away!" She screamed, "I don't need you or your stupid explanations!" I felt her hiccups flowing through the wood and I heard her muffled sobs from the other side. It's unbelievable that she still has tears to cry after all that crying earlier.

"Ino, you have to listen to me," I started, as if I was talking to the closed door, "Okay, it was my fault! I made a mistake. I screwed up. I messed up. I shouldn't have done that and I don't know what came over me. I… I just want you to forgive me for being… such a jerk…"

I waited for her to scream at me, telling me that nothing will bring her back. I was still silent, hoping she'd answer. Maybe instead of a furious cry, she'd open the door, even just a little, and she'd whisper a phrase of forgiveness. Just talk to me, Ino… say anything!

Say you hate me or say you understand! Tell me you're not okay or tell me to just leave you alone! It's just so sad not to hear your voice. It's like I'm going to just disappear here or burn if you don't talk to me. Say something!

Then, the door opened ajar. I found my Ino with her eyes red and teary from crying and her lips quivered. Her slender shoulders rose and fall like waves, coordinated with every sob and sniffle. Seeing her like this was too much for me. It's like I want to hug her and let her tears fall on me.

But I fell numb as she spoke, "Stop saying things over and over again. It makes me sick." She wiped her tears away for a second with the back of her hand and she mumbled, "You think it's not your fault, huh? Okay, fine. Just… answer this one question for me, please?"

"A-Anything." I stuttered. Only now did I stutter.

_I was trippin', I was dippin', with these women, in these streets.  
__Lost my girl, lost all that.  
__Wish I could take it back.  
__I was trippin', I was dippin', with these women, in these streets.  
__Wish I could, take that back..._

Her gaze was downward, fixed on the ground as she questioned me, "What did Temari have that I didn't that made you… go with her on that one night?"

I stared back at her and thought hard. And, guess what? I had no answer. I didn't know. I had no idea. I then turned to the ground, too, and whispered, "I don't know, Ino…" She just nodded and muttered, "I see." Her sobs overwhelmed me, too, shockingly.

Soon, I looked up from the floor and kept talking, "Ino, I'm so sorry and I just want you to forgive me. Please? Just… tell me that you forgive me. Hate me all you want, it's okay. As long as you've forgiven me despite the hatred, I'll leave you alone."

She didn't answer. She just shook her head and mouthed something that sounded like, "I can't forgive you." And there, she slowly closed the door, making a noise less than a creak. I felt my sight cloud with tears and I knew this is over. On that night with Temari, I gained nothing. It was done out of nothing. But I lost Ino.

It wasn't worth it, damn it.

'I'm sorry, Ino. Honest.' I couldn't say it anymore. It was a waste of breath if she didn't hear it. I know that it's difficult to forgive me for what I've done, so I have no reason to detest Ino for not being able to forgive me. What have I done?

Yeah, I don't know what Temari had that made me make this blunder. But, I am so sure that it's not nostalgia. Why would I get nostalgia when I have (or had) Ino, the best girl in the world? And how dare I call myself a good boyfriend.

One thing's for sure: I know what Ino has that Temari doesn't. Even now that we've broken up, even now that she hates my guts and even now as she can't forgive me, she still has my love.

And now, all I can do is walk home and suffer the consequences…

…I lost Ino. I have no one. The damage is done. I lose.

_look at the damage.. damage..  
__look at the damage.._

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**Again, this might be choppy in your opinion and I apologize for that. I hope this is fine and maybe you guys can leave a review to tell me what you think. **


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